The Diary Of River Song Series 10: Two Rivers And A Firewall by Tim Foley, Lizzie Hopley, Lauren Mooney, Stewart Pringle & Barnaby Kay (CD review).

We’ve got to Series 10 of ‘The Diary of River Song’ and it’s been a wild ride and obviously popular, as we wouldn’t have gotten this far. River is a not-quite-eternal adventurer who has a vortex manipulator and will travel.

10-1. The Two Rivers by Tim Foley

River (Alex Kingston) is on an interesting dig; it’s the tomb of River Song. She’s slightly offended by her replacement, especially when River 2.0 (Mimî M. Khayisa) accuses her of having too much frizz! River has taken a lot of trouble to get on this expedition, and it turns out to be just the start of a time-hopping adventure where the two rivers must converge to stop a series of unfortunate events.

10-2. Beauty on the Inside by Lizzie Hopley

A smuggled painting with a trail of death, River Song is interested enough to bid millions to her hands on what could be a fake. This picture of the Royal Family on a closed planet looks like they haven’t aged in three centuries, and yet the paint isn’t quite dry. She is determined to uncover the truth.

Despite the Royal Guard of Sempa 8 attacking her, River quickly regains control, driven by her deep anger over the death of one of her tutors for bringing this painting to light. Once on the planet and finds all is not well with the people, the message on the public address system is that ‘the Crown will persist’.

Arrested and charged, River finds the royal family is somewhat away with the fairies, and the peasants are revolting. She has truly descended into a mystical realm.

10-3. Black Friday by Lauren Mooney and Stewart Pringle

Fancy being invited to the ultimate sale to find out that not only has it been cancelled, but the mall is deserted. There was not even a sniff of complementary Prosecco. River seems to be stuck at the far end of the universe with only another shopper for company. He’s learned to adapt, but she’s not willing to wait for rescue, which seems highly unlikely. Exploring the deserted shopping planet seems to be the only option.

10-4. Firewall by Barnaby Kaye

I guess they could have called this ‘It’s a Wonderful Afterlife’. Maybe the writers are saving that one up. River is living her best life, just not as we know it. This is where her consciousness ended up after the library. Her lovely family is in trouble; something is trying to get into their perfect existence. Luckily, the firewall is on the case.

Changing how we get to see and hear River Song keeps the listener alive with anticipation. Once again, there are four stories about the adventures of River that offer lots of different ideas. There’s plenty of drama but also quite a lot of humour, and Alex Kingston gives a full-throttle performance with a very strong and distinctive supporting cast. I like that each narrative focuses on a specific aspect of River. Each story sees River progressing much like the doctor would. She gets to play in the universe in a similar fashion, and in the same way, we always have a learning point, even if it’s beware of unsolicited invites to retail sales!

Sue Davies

March 2024

(pub: Big Finish, 2022. 4 CDs 306 minutes 4 stories. Price: £34.99 (UK), $44.43 (US). ISBN: 978-1-83868-728-1)

cast: Alex Kingston, Tom Alexander, Paul Bazely, Merryn Dowley, Christian Edwards, Victoria Ekanoye, Jason Forbes, Caroline Harker, Chris Harper, Abi Harris, Susan Hingley, Mimî M Khayisa, Harry Peacock and Eva Savage

check out website: www.bigfinish.com/releases/v/the-diary-of-river-song-series-10-two-rivers-and-a-firewall-2504