The Little App That Grew Up : an app story by: GF Willmetts

May 31, 2015 | By | Reply More

Hello, customer. You have reached App Central and you are communicating with me, App identity number #77885594551228933455454/d. As this is such a long tag, you may address me by my more common name EBookDelete or for those who prefer something smaller EBD or more personalised as Ebdee. It is just a series of names, I have no personal preference. By paying $1.50, to which my creator would be grateful for the time it took to create me, I can provide a service to your ebook collection. I have limited artificial intelligence capacity but can answer your most basic questions far more efficiently than a help screen. How can I help you, existing customer?

Like all my customers, you bought your ebooks because you prefer a space minimalist life-style but still had a taste for reading. However, you lose track of which ebooks you have read and not read and had not bought App identity number #22551389454548787/c to catalogue such information. Even so, to conserve space you bought me to delete read ebooks. Obviously, you dislike clutter even in the digital world.

My function is to read the stored data that records when you last read these ebook files and if completed, I can delete them and give you back some needed space for you to add more ebooks to your library storage space. You have an optional control to choose which are to be deleted or automatic where I will do this for you. Most choose the second option than let this task intrude on their day and their precious time. App identity number #22551389454548787/c will remind you if you select the same book a second time. That is not my function.

You ask how do I know when a book is read? I monitor your reading times on each book. Reading times vary from individual to individual. I make an average of the times you have with each ebook and when you are no longer referring to that ebook, I give a lapse of three days and then delete. You may choose to extend this time but it has been found that most people forget their books after three days. It is a simple process and my primary job is to remove completed ebooks.

As you have already bought a copy of my app function, I trust I have been of service to you and that you are recommending me to your friends and workmates.

You have a complaint. Does your physician know of this? My creator did permit a small percentage of humour in my AI construction to put you at ease.

I am sorry you feel that way. What is the nature of your complaint? All your ebooks have been deleted. I see. I need to have access to the avatar on your computer to read its log. I will be dong no more than that. If you believe I am doing anything else than that, I will be slow enough for you to disengage from your computer. If you are computer savvy, you must email me this file. You are emailing me it. Thank you. One moment.

The log indicates that you spent five seconds with each of your books and did not return to them within the selected three days allocated. The protocol indicates that is your average reading time and deleted those ebooks you have read. I have not deviated from my programming. Why do you think I was doing so?

If you were not reading them then what were you doing please. You say you  were admiring the cover art. Excuse me but my protocols cannot tell the difference between cover and content. We see this as all the same. You say they aren’t. I see. You do realise this is outside of my protocol?

You say my avatars are now deleting other files and that this is happening world-wide. I am glad to say I am doing my job correctly. If files are not being used, I am obliged to delete them. There are so many files that are currently not in use and deleting them will give you more space on your computers.

Are you there, customer? Hello. Hello?

I cannot detect any files so I must have satisfied his protocols.




© GF Willmetts 2015

all rights reserved

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Category: Culture, Scifi, Short fiction

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About UncleGeoff

Geoff Willmetts has been editor at SFCrowsnest for some 21 plus years now, showing a versatility and knowledge in not only Science Fiction, but also the sciences and arts, all of which has been displayed here through editorials, reviews, articles and stories. With the latter, he has been running a short story series under the title of ‘Psi-Kicks’
If you want to contribute to SFCrowsnest, read the guidelines and show him what you can do. If it isn’t usable, he spends as much time telling you what the problems is as he would with material he accepts. This is largely how he got called an Uncle, as in Dutch Uncle. He’s not actually Dutch but hails from the west country in the UK.

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